Now or never!

Between every two goals, there is a thing called “life” which is to be lived. So while you’re busy running in this mad race, slow down and think to yourself, are you compromising your present for the sake of your future? A future that never arrives, because present is all you have.

When we come to 9^th standard, they say it’s the most vital class and if we give our best now, the remaining three years become slightly easier. Then in 10^th, we’re told that being the first year of “public examination” we must take it seriously now. Then 11^th, they say it’s the first leap towards building a successful career, and unlike the rest, we must work hard now. In 12^th, the words constantly told and re-told are, “it’s now or never.”  I must tell you that this will not end even when you are in college, or are looking for a job or are working; there is always ‘ONE MORE STEP’ still to go. Always.

Amidst all this turmoil of running for forms and demand drafts and making huge career decisions, I felt that we always will feel inadequate with whatever we have because there is someone still ahead of you in the race. But I strongly believe that no matter what we achieve in life, we must be happy and satisfied. Satisfaction with what we get because happiness too is important.

We must work hard, yes – give our best shot in everything. But then whatever the results are, we must not miss out on the beautiful visions on the way. Live the moment because it’s truly “now or never.”

I will always love you!*

*offer valid till stocks last

Most of us have heard someone say this to us, one time or the other, one way or the other. Who wouldn’t want to “believe” something of this sort? Knowing someone cares about you, knowing someone does give a shit, just knowing someone’s out there who knows you beyond a name.

But really, what’s it worth in today’s modern commercial times? India has the second largest population in the world. Hence statistically, for each person there are 1,155,347,677 people to choose from and fall in love with. There is one person for some, and many for a lucky few (or unlucky, as I’d say!) So, what’s it worth, being told you’re loved? Or telling someone you love them? Opinions are always subjective, hence I’ve a fundamental right to have my own. For me, love now is a conditional emotion, like never before. Can you blame anyone? With so many god-darn options, lucky are the ones who’ve someone who sticks with them.  

I must ask though, can you take back your “I love you” to someone, as per conditions? What really intrigues me is, when exactly and why do you tell someone you love them? Most people say they haven’t figured out what love is, then have they never told anyone they love them? And once you do, can you “take it back” as and when you feel the need to? Most people say it’s extremely hurtful when someone you love lets you down, be it as a friend, as a lover, as family, but when we said we love them, whatever might be the sense, didn’t we assure we’d look beyond their mistakes? And if they can’t, how are they any different from those million strangers, who as well would only focus on the mistakes?

“Being loved is precious, and we must forever be grateful we are”, so I was told, and so I believed. But never could I think of love as temporary or conditional. We all might have varying definitions of love, but I can bet there’s not one amongst us all, who can possibly use these two as adjectives describing love. I was wrong. Love isn’t as ideal as I thought it to be. Love is now convenient, conditional & temporary. You may say it today, and take it back tomorrow because the person “let you down.” Mistakes, we all make mistakes. But are they reason enough to stop loving someone, who you were once smitten by? Or who you wanted in your life forever? Or who you’ve had immense support from? That’s right, it’s all in the past, because the person screwed up. So what if you once said you’d always be there? Big deal. Suddenly, you wanna give up on the person you believed the most in. You want them to suffer, because they hurt you. You want them to keep apologizing for something they can’t change, something irreversible. It’s only fair, they should’ve known better before screwing up. They should’ve known that “I’d always be there, no matter what” are just comforting words in misery, and nothing more. You move on, so do they. Life goes on. We wake up the next morning, wishing for a perfect day and trying to forget “love ever happened to us.” It’s all gonna be okay, so we say and we all like to believe it. We know there’s gonna be yet another from the 1,155,347,677 people(what are the chances, afterall?) to confess love, with the exact same liberty and right. But would you believe it? I know I wouldn’t.

I might sound pessimistic, but I’m being realistic. With such bitter sarcasm, I just hope my readers can realize what it’s worth saying/hearing “I love you” from someone. How assuring the idea of love must be. That person is going to make mistakes, and hurt or disappoint you but only the ones you truly love can do that. Love is beyond reasons. Love is unconditional. You love a person, not his/her conditions. So, take the time you need before you say it, but when you do actually, mean it with all of you. Mean it enough for the person to trust you with blind eyes. Don’t be afraid of getting hurt, because when you’ll actually find love, it won’t ever hurt.  

PS. This entry also emphasizes majorly on my blog’s name, “God hates us all.” It’s not because of atheistism. It’s because we ruined “love” for him. 

Who are you, really?

"Time plays tricks on you. One day you're dreaming, and the next day your dream becomes your reality. It was the best of the times, if only someone would've told me. Mistakes were made, hearts were broken, harsh lessons learned."

The above quote aptly describes my 18 years of journey through what they call "Life."

I can bet, that there isn't a single person among my readers, who wouldn't have come across a quote or philosophy of the type, "be who you really are." Yet, the hardest question any of us had had to answer is, "tell us something about yourself." None of us has answered that one spontaneously, we've always had notes prepared.

But we all know the one person you've spent the most time with, is you yourself. Then why is this question so difficult? What is the big deal about accepting oneself, just as we are?

What amuses me the most, is that while we ourselves can't really accept what we really are, there isn't one person who wouldn't get offended when someone passes a judgement about them. Thats when our defence has statements like, "you haven't lived my life or had my experiences, on what basis can you say what I am?"

And that is EXACTLY my point. Nobody, but you has lived your life. Hence, nobody can know you better than yourself. We all know, "to err is human." Therefore, there's not one person who doesn't have flaws, or never made any mistakes. But we can't confess them. So how can you expect your past to not haunt you? You can't run away from yourself. I believe there is always a reason for what we do, did. No matter how short lived, pathetic, or unnecessary it might be, but there is a reason, and you know it best.

I heard this quote when I was a li'l kid, but its only now that I've understand what it really means, "to love oneself is the beginning of a life long romance." We all are attention seekers in one way or the other, desperate to fit in since we all are aware of the saying, survival of the fittest. That quote has lingered through generations, and still has the same worth. So if we all are only humans, and same in so many different ways, then why are we ashamed to say it?

Well, lets say, I don't blame Raghuram for getting so aggressive at the participants when they pretend to be what they aren't to be accepted! I mean, even the sound of pretence is pitiful. If you need to pretend, then the only person whose insulting you the most, are you. You're clearly saying you aren't good enough to display your true self in public. Do you now think there's someone who can insult you any further than this? I guess not. 

As offensive as this might sound, but people seem to be getting dumber and dumber by the day. All  we do is react emotionally when provoked, and ignore the rational part of it. We are so into pseudo communicating in the presence of all those social networking sites, that we have lost touch with ourselves. Give it a moment, think about it. Seriously.

PS - Before any one of you bothers to mention me being a part of what i'm complaining about, I know I'm there amongst the best/worst forms of it. Hence, the self loathing. Adieu!